Fabio is doing well.

However KJ, he is genuinely concerned about The Rev Kev’s health. Could you please reassure him that this ‘Great Man’ is doing much ‘betterer’?

Warm Regards,

The Tutor.

Dear The Tutor – Perhaps it’s best not to tell Fabio but the Lodge’s head chef resigned yesterday. Things came to a head after he presented The Rev Kev with a big bowl of spaghetti as per Fabio’s recipe.
I said NO oil of virgin, I said NO oil of virgin was ever to come near me! he yelled.
The head chef (trained in Bologna) told The Rev Kev in no uncertain terms that he was an artist NOT a calorie counter. He packed up there and then.
Terese R has spent all day counting the contents of the Lodge’s antique canteens of silver cutlery.
KJ.

I never knew foxes were so sentimental.

They ran after Festina (I still call her Brekkie) and the Five Super Puppies for several miles as we departed from Chudleigh, now a Hound and Hunstmen Free Zone.

They made a mighty commotion of grief as we turned round the bend and headed towards godless Godalming and its posh Charterhouse school with its beatings and British bullshit.

I looked back.

Lord Farty had mounted his old horse and was toasting us with his stirrup cup of malt…..

I began to laugh and weep simultaneously.

Seven maids a-screaming, one colonel yelling, twelve hound dogs fleeing, one spinster drinking, one duke a-fainting, one princess a-peeing…..

Five Super Puppies wagging…

Of all the creatures in the wood,
The Super Puppies wear the crown

And one lord a-drinking, a thousand foxes a-yipping………..

Farty came good in the end.

THE END

http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2009/05/22/2578534.htm

The first shots rang out in what may prove to be the ultimate confrontation in rural England, indeed wherever foxes are in the fields.

Today, I can report that agents of Lord Fartingdon (self-appointed commander-in-chief of Surrey Foxes In Rebellion against hunters) have disarmed their foes in the village of Chudleigh.

I spoke with the lord, or Lord Farty as he is locally known, a short time ago…….

THERE IS A PART OF A FLOWERY FIELD THAT IS FOREVER FOX.

KINDLY EXCUSE ME I NEED A DRINK.

This is Edward R. Borrow
Good Morning and Good Luck.

The Vicar: Alexander Downer.
Farty: Bob Ellis.
Festina (nee Brekkie): Inspector Rex.

Somewhere in Surrey I think.

The Five Super Puppies are naturals.

Absinthe 1 pushed down the shotgun, Absinthe 2 pushed it into position, Absinthe 3 and 4 steadied it and Absinthe 5 put a paw to trigger.

Kaboooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom.
Second barrel:
Blaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

Big hole in fake Georgian ceiling….and……
Seven maids a-screaming, one colonel yelling, twelve hound dogs fleeing, one spinster drinking, one duke a-fainting, one princess a-peeing…..

Five Super Puppies wagging…

Of all the creatures in the wood,
The Super Puppies wear the crown.

Seven maids a-screaming, one colonel yelling, twelve hound dogs fleeing,
one spinster drinking, one duke a-fainting, one princess a-peeing…..

And one Mummy licking, Five Super Puppies romping…………..

End of chapter V

Tutor impressed with my last writing to you. She is put some INGS onto my words. Thats OK because she is kind just like Mrs KJ Gwennie.

Is OK to say Gwennie? We do formal/informal soon. Gwennie nice name eh?

Im-port-ant bizness: The Rev-er-end’s recipe to get him good. When Fabio sick Mumma make simple spaghetti. Not to hard on the tummy.

Only 3 or 4 stuff in this spaghetti for sick peoples.

Cook spaghetti al dente.
While spaghetti hot, put in some oil of virgin.
Some salt and pepper for the sick Rev Man.
If the sick Rev Man like spinach, can fine chop and it will cook itself in hot pasta.

Fabio is happy to help big cobber get betterer.

Amore to everybody, Fabio.

*Lord Fartingdon is a man of magnificent proportions and gargantuan appetites.

*He has married and divorced more American women than Mickey Rooney.

*He can drink a bottle of malt before 10am without making a grammatical error.
He taught Peter O’Toole to say: Marvellous, Simply Bloody Marvellous (with the right inflection) over a second bottle of Tullamore Dew.

*He outraged his family by gaining annulments from the Pope and becoming a Roman Catholic.

*Although a man of great crudity he took the Baptismal name of Francis in St Peter’s Basilica because of the Saint’s love of animals.

*Lord Farty, however, is NOT a vegetarian and can eat a chicken faster than any fox.

*He changed the family motto from
Fartus Fartus to The Fighting Fox.

The Ginger Man.