CONGRATULATIONS TO LORD GINGE!

OVER PRECISELY THE LAST TWO HOURS, TGM HAS SMASHED THE WORLD RECORD FOR REAL-TIME STORYTELLING BLOGGING.

IN DOING SO, TGM HAS RE-WRITTEN THE RULES FOR ‘WRITERLY’ TYPES EVERYWHERE.

THANKS TO OUR PASSION-AGRRESSIVE ADVENTURER, LORD GINGE. KJ.

There is more than a touch of Audrey Hepburn about you, Stiffy, I told Miss MontyRose Stiffingdon-Skidmarks. And more than a little of Gregory Peck in The Chief Monk.

Perhaps we could get a motor scooter and you and he could tour Leeton, visiting the old Cannery Site where the Monk could pretend to lose his hand in a pineapple slicer.

Also Stiffy I think you could would look very cute in striped men’s pyjamas while you sleep as the Press try to find you.

Also you have that ineffable ‘Princess’ quality that goes with the role in ‘LEETON HOLIDAY’.

The Chief Monk is a reporter from Darvish Daily News.

Another alternative is you in ‘BREAKFAST AT SCAPPELI’S FISH BAR’, based on a novel by Truman Carp, a Leeton fisherman from the days when we had water.

* Officially part of The Ginger Man’s world record storytelling blogging attempt.

Perhaps only WATER ( unknown on the Planet of the Apes) will rid us of this Invasion of the Interplanetary Zombies.

Trouble is this Film (The Cleft Stick Man Versus Planet Of The Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie) is to be shot in an IRRIGATION AREA WITHOUT WATER.

A small problem we must overcome along with no film, and no camera and no funds.

We may have to make a Public Appeal.

*More to come very soon as Lord Ginge pushes himself to new creative limits as he attempts to break the world record for the most storytelling blogs over two hours.

The gang have helped me erect this canvas placard across the main street.

Rehearsals have begun.

Locals have dusted their faces with wheat flour, painted black circles under their eyes, made artificial sores on their faces and practised walking with jerky motions and saying AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH and EERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR or EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

The Parade of the Zombies toward the Town Hall should be something to see.

O’Toole and I have taken a case of Absinthe to the hall so that we have alternative HQ outside the Trailer.

The Mayor (Zed Man) is beside himself with joy at the prospect of becoming a star. He has Hollywood in his eyes.

Cellars and bins are beinmg raided for old clothes along with Halloween costumes.

You cannot get any sense of of the locals. They do not say Hello any more, but:
UUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

* PART OF THE GINGER MAN’S OFFICIAL WORLD RECORD BLOGGING ATTEMPT.

GOOD LUCK LORD GINGE!

Our creative sessions are NOT macho!

I have invited Try Do and Miss Stiffingon-Skidmarks to join us in our Script Development Session.

TGM: Will you make some suggestions, Try Do?

TD: I Try Do.

TGM: What about you, Stiffy me gel?

MontyRose Stiffington-Skidmarks:

Pretty women in floral bubble skirts running and dancing in the fields, delivering wicker baskets of devon sandwiches to Zed Man and his evil crew?

O’Toole: Marvellous, simply bloody marvellous!!!!

* The latest in The Cleft Stick Man Versus Planet Of The Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie script development saga up as soon as Lord Ginge reports in.

*Part of TGM’s historic world record attempt: The most real time storytelling blogs ever recorded over two hours.

AMAZING!

O’Toole: Let’s have the Mayor in for a Trailer Creative Session.

TGM: I don’t mind that.

O’T: Come in my comrade from Thespis…have a drink…….

Mayor: (I don’t mind that).

TGM: Good: Now how do you see the Story Line? Zed Man has landed, promising all sorts of dreadful things from his Zombie Horde, things look very dire….have another absinthe……

O’T: Point is, dear fellow, how do we encourage him to piss off, not to make a big thing of it. Get your Creative Juices flowing, old man.

Mayor: We could offer him a temporary protection visa, and TPVs for all of his living dead crew.

O’T: Yes?

Mayor: Or we could ask him to go to Gundagai.

O’T: Or?

Mayor: Sri Lanka.

O’T: Marvellous, simply bloody marvellous. Is Malcom Turnbull on the telephone?

Godwin Grech: I have his email address in my Cleft Stick.

O’T: Keep him informed, old chap. Now a drink for you too….Godwin, old Chum Godwin……

* Next chapter in The Cleft Stick Man Versus Planet Of The Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie script development up as soon as it comes off Lord Ginge’s typewriter.

STAND BY!

ON LOCATION: LEETON, New South Wales.

Script development session: The Cleft Stick Man versus Planet of the Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie.

Communication could be the key.

I have written Godwin Grech into the Script.

TGM: You have your cleft stick?

GG: Yessir.

Here is your message to go into the Cleft Sick:

ZED MAN STOP WILL NOT BE INTIMIDATED BY YOU STOP PLEASE TAKE YOURSELF AND THE DEAD ZOMBIES OUT OF OUR COMFORT ZONE. SIGNED THE FEARLESS THE GINGER MAN.

PS:OUR MESSENGER IS ALSO BEARING ICED VO VO BISCUITS AS A GESTURE OF INTERPLANETARY GOODWILL. STOP.

Get cracking Godwin. Our hopes go with you.

GG: I’ll just be going outside for a while.

Well, Peter what do you think of the material?

P O’T: Marvellous. Simply bloody marvellous.

Let’s have another drinking session and get down to some serious shooting scheduling…..

*New Post in 20 minutes. LESS THAN THE SCHEDULED HALF AN HOUR.

THE GINGER MAN HAS DECLARED:

LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I AM ATTEMPTING THIS NIGHT OF NOVEMBER 15TH, 2009 TO SET A NEW BLOGGING RECORD VIA THE FACILITIES OF KERRIEJEAN.COM.
THE RECORD?
THE MOST REAL TIME STORYTELLING BLOG POSTS EVER RECORDED OVER TWO HOURS.

More to come soon. VERY SOON!

Dear Roma Street,

KJ.

You have a trailer? Marvellous. Simply Bloody Marvellous.

Guinness, Jameson, Absinthe, Pink Gin?

Ditto.

I have made a quick story board and script:

Dark and Stormy Night. Lonely highway between Leeton and Gundagai.

Sports car containing a handsome Darvish monk and a petite nurse, Try Do.

From the bushes comes an attractive mature woman, Miss MontyRose Stiffington-Skidmarks.

MRSS-S: They have landed! They have landed! Z-Man is here with his alien hordes.

The Chief Monk: Truedatyesirreebob?

MRSS-S: Yessirree!

TCM: Ring dat Joe Hockey Cleft Stick. Tell him we is focissed, yessireebob.

Try Do: I Try Do.

TCM: Ring dat Captain Baker, who say May Day May Day weallgonnadie!

TD: I Try Do….

MRSS-S: I feel so much safer now I have a warm muscular male arm to shelter under.

* Watch The Cleft Stick Man versus Planet of the Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie script unfold. New post in half an hour.

I have bought a trailer out of the funds from the Cleft Stick government grant.

On the side of the trailer is proudly displayed: CLEFT STICK FILM PRODUCTIONS.

I telephoned Peter O’Toole who has agreed to come.

His comment: Marvellous, Simply Bloody Marvellous!

Working title:

Cleft Stick Man versus Planet of the Apes Living Dead and Z-Man The Zombie.

* See how ‘Z-Man The Zombie’ script unfolds – as it comes off Lord Ginge’s typewriter. NEW post in half-an-hour.